The Compendium of Advice for University
09 September 2004 // 1:04 p.m."Don't sleep with anyone in your first week. You'll spend the rest of the year trying to get rid of them."
"Don't sleep with lecturers until your third year."
- A friend's friend's partner who once gave me free chocolate from her health food shop. She also gave me many other pieces of advice, but all of them began with "Don't sleep with..." so you get the gist at least.
"Try everything and anything at least once and you'll have time of your life."
- My favourite teacher who let us eat biscuits and gossip about other members of staff in our lessons.
"Bon Courage!"
- Other French teacher.
"The first two weeks will be Hell and you'll just want to go home, but after that it gets a lot better."
"...Simply turn the toaster onto its side and insert a normal cheese sandwich to make a toasted sandwich without a toasted sandwich maker!"
- My quirky Uncle Allan.
"Don't drink too much at Fresher's Week, because you won't know whether the people you're with will help you out of the gutter and get you home, or just leave you there."
- Karen's older sister.
"The ducks will keep you awake and drive you insane."
- My A-Level Biology teacher. He went to the same Uni as me.
